Oh, poop! I messed up. And this time there's going to be heck to pay.
First off, let me say how sorry I am. Really. I am sorry and embarrassed and ask forgiveness from all of you who will suffer because of my lack of consideration on your behalf.
You see, recently I read where a British environmentalist told government officials in the UK that couples who have more than two children are "being irresponsible by creating an unbearable burden on the environment."
The chair of Britain's Sustainable Development Commission went on to say that curbing population growth through contraception and abortion must be at the heart of policies to fight global warming. He said political leaders and green campaigners should stop dodging the issue of environmental harm caused by an expanding population.
In published reports the chap said he was unapologetic about asking people to fess up to their own responsibility for their own environmental footprint and how they decide to procreate and how many children they think are appropriate.
A report by the commission, to be published next month, will say that governments must reduce population growth through better family planning.
Dang! I didn't know I was personally responsible for global warming. My wife and I should be ashamed of ourselves. We've brought four lives into this world over the past 25 or years or so. And we have friends who have exceeded the limit of "two-per" as well. The shame of it all!
Now, I want to say right here that I love to take hikes in the wild, and canoe on rivers and lakes, and watch sunsets and sunrises from lofty mountain peaks, and swim in the ocean or bask in the sun on a beach somewhere. I love to watch birds and deer and coyote and critters of all sorts frolic in their own habitats. I am -- to some extent -- an avid outdoorsman.
And now, to find out that I am single-handedly (along with millions of other loving parents) wrecking the world, well - it's just downright disheartening.
Maybe I can blame my ancestors. Maybe this "over-the-limit" thing is hereditary. After all, my grandfather on my dad's side had four sons. My dad had four sons. One of his brothers had five sons. And one of my mom's uncles fathered 13 kids with the same wife. Now you go and tell me that my wife and I, and many of the couples we know, have exceeded the PFSL (preferred family size limit).
Oh yeah, I also recently read where a bunch of Hollywood stars were gathering for a huge "birthday bash" for the National Abortion Rights League.
Is it just me, or does anyone else find it more than a little ironic that an abortion rights group would celebrate a birthday of any kind?
Again, I apologize for putting planet Earth firmly on the course for disaster and eminent death. But, man, it's great to be an American these days!