Since the month of April has been designated Child Abuse Prevention Month, we'd like to share some thoughts about its causes.It would be very easy to say that there are bad parents in the world; however, in 25 years in the field, I have never met a parent who set out to do a "bad" job with his or her child.

A manual comes with most new things we purchase these days. But no manual comes with a new baby. I remember when I first tried to give my son his infant vitamins. It was an oily liquid to be administered in my son's mouth via a dropper. Gabe was all of two weeks old when I squirted that nasty stuff in his mouth, which caused him to gag, sputter and then stop breathing!

Good thing his dad was home. We turned Gabe upside down. Thankfully, the concoction spewed out and I realized that the job of parenting may be a steep learning curve for me.

Why are kids abused?

There are many factors. In the first column we mentioned the effects of illegal drugs or excessive alcohol consumption on a caregiver. We also identified financial, work related or other stressors, which wash over to the home life. Some people go too far with the "Spare the rod, spoil the child" concept. They use that text in the Bible to justify over-zealous discipline, which is really abuse.

Others received abuse themselves as children. It's what they know and what they revert to when faced with those experiences. There are differences among varying cultures and ethnic groups regarding child-rearing and discipline of children.

In some cases, parents aren't paying good enough attention to what is going on with their children; in others, parents turn "a blind eye."

Unfortunately, parents sometimes choose a partner who is abusive either emotionally, physically, or sexually. The relationship with the abusive partner is valued more than the safety and well-being of their child.

Older folks say the world is moving much faster these days. All of the technology and all of the busy-ness of life often distract us from our fundamental job of parenting. We get caught up with the cell phones and soccer, the science fairs and scholarship applications. We may miss the signs of what is going on with our kids.

Anyone who suspects abuse can file a report with the Child Abuse Hotline 800-392-3738. Your report can be anonymous and will be held in confidence by Children's Division.

Parents may not always know where to go for help. ParentLink is a resource for parents in Missouri. The ParentLink website is: extension.missouri.edu/parentlink.