Disruptive Moments and a Grieving Child

Our childhood, in my opinion, is supposed to be one of the most carefree, lackadaisical, joyful times of our life. Dreams of "what we want to be when we grow up", days filled with swimming at the pool, a game of baseball, eating ice cream so fast your head starts to hurt, "pinky swearing", playing outside until dusk, sleeping late, and watching Saturday morning cartoons. Yet, I witness kid's days filled with text messaging, Facebook, video games, and pain. Young lives are often altered in many ways by not only the aforementioned but in ways uncontrolled by them, devastating acts such as a death of a parent, loved one, or friend. Although death is a natural thing we all must face at some point, dealing with a loss younger in life has issues that we as adults might not realize.

Gordan McDonald writes in his book The Life God Blesses of "disruptive moments" which he describes as "those unanticipated events, most of which one would usually have chosen to avoid had it been possible." No one of us wants to suffer, nor do we want to see our friends and family suffer but for whatever reason, God places disruptive moments in our lives. For myself, I believe I suffered through my disruptive moment so that I may share with others and quite possibly get them through their "disruptive moment".

As reported for the Democrat News by staff writer Sydney Stonner, a grief support group dealing with children struggling with a loss will begin Thursday, February 12. The six-week series will be held on Thursday nights from 6 to 8 p.m. in a classroom at Fitzgibbon Hospital. The goal of the sessions is to assist children and their parents through the grief process.

Since the loss of my husband in 2002, I have taken an active role in Hospice as a volunteer and often speak at the grief support groups. For some this may come as a surprise but I enjoy speaking and sharing at these group sessions. Undoubtedly, I can relate to almost everything a participant is feeling because I have been in their shoes. Clearly, not everyone grieves the same nor do we grieve at the same speed thus the importance for a support group.

Finding support among other grieving participants, most find a sense of ease and assistance through the grief process. While a natural reaction to a loss is grief, many if not all of those dredging through the grief journey is prepared for the pain and suffering that is associated with grief. In my opinion, a support group helps provide safety and feelings of support that only those walking that same journey can relate.

If someone finds himself or herself struggling with grief, please consider attending the support group. If you have suffered the death of a loved one, whether a family member or friend, grief counseling is a natural and acceptable affirmation of your loss.